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Bigger Better Faster More [tom@BiggerBetterFasterMore.net] Sent: Friday, March 22, 2002 12:29 AM Subject: And Now a Word From BiggerBetterFasterMore Hi......... I have been sitting here racking my brain for the better part of 5 minutes and it appears that I have no amusing angle for this evening's email. This happens from time to time,ya see many of you nice folks tell me how much you enjoy my emails and ask me where on earth I come up with all the unusual stuff that I say and I tell you that I'm no different than anyone else out there and anyone could do it and a lot more "aw shucks" kind of bulls*#t. The truth of the matter is that I am a genius. We all know this but I can't come right out and say it to you, cuz that would be arrogant. These funny thoughts don't just come to me. Did Bethoven's symphonies just "come" to him? Did Shakepear just grab his quill pen and "wing it"? Hell no!! Normally, in order to get my inspiration for this weekly email I strip naked, smoke a joint that has been soaked in embalming fluid and then choke myself with a neck-tie while watching pornography. That, my friends, is how I come up with the wacky crap that I spew out week after week. But this week, I have no joints, no embalming fluid, my neck-tie is at the cleaners and I lent all of my porn to Rob from Faded Image, so this email won't be quite as chuckle-riffic as you're used to. I had fun at Olde Towne last week. Did you? Good..... This weekend you should come and see us play because we are really good and you will have a lot of fun unless there is something very, very, very, very wrong with you. And even if there is something very, very, very, very wrong with you, you should come and see us because Mike is very warm and he'll hold you and make you feel better. Saturday March 23 BiggerBetterFasterMore will be stroking our instruments in public at JILLIANS of ANNAPOLIS, MD 410-841-5599. Remember friends this is not the fancy new Jillians at Arundel Mills. This is the fancy young Jillians on Sommerville Rd off of West St in Annapolis. Don't go to the wrong place or you'll be eaten by rats and smoten by the lord!! Jillians is very cool. Do you like pool, air hockey and state of the art video games? Neither do I, but I do like booze, broads and umm..........bagels and at least two of those three things will be there. Do us a big fat favor and come on out and bring some friends. We really like playing in Annapolis and it takes lots of people to make this room look full. Some of the people that have been asking whether or not we will be playing in Pasadena again should come out and see us at Jillians cuz that might be the closest that we get to that area for the forseeable future and we truly miss those folks and we'd love to see them again. There are new pictures, schedules and funny things at www.BiggerBetterFasterMore.net. Go and look at them. Don't forget...........ahhh, I forgot. Later or Sooner, Tom Mike Jody David
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